These last 10 pounds are driving me CRAZY!

I don't know what to do!  They are stuck!  Wedged on my outer thighs and lower tummy!

I've decided to name them!  It sounds nuts and maybe it is...but maybe just maybe I subconsciously have befriended these last pounds and truly can't bare to see them go!  But they need to go!  It's a momma bird sending her baby birds off to fly!

So names...I can't really relate them to the area because I have no idea where they are all hiding.  Some are on my hip...only a few.

Name number 1 will be Dexter.  I think of Dexter as a smart name and the first one to jump ship in this case is the smartest.  I will not punish Dexter as harshly as the rest for sticking around and making my pants just a little too tight!

Name number 2 is Poseidon.  I know it seems like a very godly name but really...I think poseidon is just an imposter...acting like water but really a fat blob in disguise.  When Poseidon goes I won't be able to blame the weight gain on water and if the pound does come back...It's poseidon and I will work my thighs off to make him go away

Pause...oh by the way,  I'm not naming them after men because I hate men...it's just coincidental in this case.

Name for pound number 3 is Hulk.  Hulk is probably on my thigh and trying to blend in with the muscle, but I can see right through him...he's all green and fat!

Name number 4: Al (sort for Al Dente)  I think Al came to live with me because of my love of carbs.  Buh bye Al!  Al, I believe will go live with someone that likes pasta.

Name number 5:  Jose.  Jose came to live with me because of my love of Mexico...if I gain anything back after dining at a Mexican restaurant I will welcome Jose back...that won't be anytime soon though so the road is short for Jose.

Name number 6.  Genius (nickname for Guinness) something tells me I will always have a spare room for Genius, but it's only for visits!  He cannot take up permanent residence on my belly any longer.  There is no room at the inn!

Name number 7.  Pat.  I don't know what pat is girl maybe boy, ambiguously gay for all I know.  Pat is there because I sat!  Pat is the pound I have due to lack of movement!  Pat can never come back!

Name number 8.  Sarah.  (a true girl name give her an award like a new living arrangement!)  Sarah's last name is Lee...no more of those.

Name number 9.  Pitney.  In old English it means "island of the stubborn one"  anyone holding on this long has to be stubborn.

Lastly number 10 is Edward (Edward Smith)  named after the captain of the titanic...Because if he doesn't get off THIS ship we are going down together!