Actually I had been planning on doing it. J died today. Her favorite drink is a bloody mary. When people close to me die I toast to them with their favorite drink. For my mom it is Kahlua coffee. I have it every year on the anniversary of her death. I came home and told hubby that tonight I would be having a bloody mary. We went to the store and bought the lowest carb Bloody mary mix we could find. I made it in a small 4 oz glass. I lined the rim with chipotle powder and put an olive in it. I made hubby a much bigger one and we toasted to the life of J. I chewed the olive and then spit it out...not ready to actually eat. Now I'm drunk!
I had my first mammogram today. Not so bad...the technician was a South African. The song "I never met a nice south african" (shown here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeDk6ZeGNnU ) rang in my head the entire procedure...no matter how hard I tried to get it out! She really was very gentle and very nice. The whole thing was very quick. I got out early and was driving down clairemont mesa blvd...it was 11:55am and I realized in just 5 minutes that OA meeting I've been trying to go to at lunch starts. I was 3 blocks from it so I went! It was as I thought it would and yep I totally related to everyone in the room. I'm a compulsive eater. Most of them had trouble at night. Many kept food journals...others had time since binge. One lady stated it had been 8 months since her last binge and others avoided sugar as a desert or sugar entirely. I did as they said...took what I needed and left the rest. For me...I think I will not be so hard on myself. I will avoid sugar and white flour and whatever other "trigger foods" I discover along the way, but occasionally I will plan to eat them in moderation. Like tonight. I had a drink in moderation and I didn't eat. I will watch myself re: the binging and consider that a "relapse" if that happens. I'm excited. I really feel I belong there. I felt relieved when I left.
When I got back to work life began again. J had passed and I being the senate president had more on my plate than ever before. Did I mention she was the president for 13 years before I "dethroned" her? It took a while for her to forgive me for that, but she did and I have made a legacy of her service since that time. So that's my plate today. OI!
1 comment:
Ooooooo, cheated? I bet it tasted good.
Just in case I croak in the near future, my new favorite drink is a black and tan...I'll let you know if it changes.
Sorry about your friend Joyce. I didn't know you "dethroned" her. I'm glad she eventually forgave you.
Ooooooo the booby-squish. I've always wondered how that would go with implants, but sounds like it was no problem. Glad for that. Maybe it's only the smallish boobs that get pinched hard (me!)
OA sounds like the place for you. It sounds like it was more comfortable than the Optifast meetings. It'll be good for you to have a connection after you end your sessions at Optifast.
You'll definitely have to give me some tips and hints, too. I am definitely STILL an over eater.
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