Day 50

I posted something (Day 35) that I forgot to post...I wrote it, edited it and then just forgot to post.  OY!  Hopefully that doesn't confuse you with the date.

Last nights weigh in 185.5

I shared in class last week about the break down I had.  Everyone was in shock, what are the chances of having two people in the class that have parents that were shot in the face?  Familiar lady was absent.  I kinda wanted her to hear what I had to say, but it wasn't to be.

I didn't write about that class but here are some sound bites :

• I need to make the connection between how I feel (or felt) and how I use food.
• Changing my lifestyle means no white knuckling (Basically don't deprive myself but don't  go the other way to excess)
• Don't starve myself with food or emotions, no black and white thinking (eat ton's Monday starve myself Tuesday)
• We did a chart of our life over time, how much we weighed and when then we plugged in events.  Of course when there were big life events...I got fat.
• Certain emotions trigger food learn what they are. For me it is anxiety, sadness and anger.

I'm going to write about yesterday's class and post it tomorrow.  I'm still on step one of the OA stuff, the workbook has a lot of writing.  I'm thinking of starting another blog and putting it all in there.  Not sure if I will make it public or just a private one for me to type quickly on the steps.  I may cut and paste some of the good stuff into here.  Still working that out.